Bite Me: A Love Story by Christopher Moore.

Now this may be a faux pas, but I am going to do another reaction to a vampire book... but let me tell you, this is so different from Let The Right One In it's not even funny. Actually... it's very funny. In a sort of you had to be there way.
I can never get enough of Christopher Moore. This man is a flippin' genius. Although I do not think this is his best book (that honor either goes to Lamb, A Dirty Job or Blood Sucking Fiends: A Love Story).
This is the third part of his series about vampires set in San Francisco.

When the series began, it was the story of C. Thomas Flood, an aspiring writer from middle America. He moves to San Francisco to realise his dream of being a writer.  He meets a woman named Jody late one night outside of his job at a local Safeway, where he manages the night stocking crew known as The Animals. A local homeless man known as The Emperor (who is the Emperor of San Francisco and Protector of Mexico, based on the real life Emperor Norton) plays the part of guide, observer and knight errant. So after he meets Jody and befriends the Emperor, Tommy thinks he's got a pretty sweet deal going on. What he doesn't realise is that Jody is a vampire... and his life will never be the same.

In the first two books, they defeat the vampire that turned Jody with the help of two SF police officers, the Emperor, his dogs Bummer and Lazarus and all the Animals, except Simon. They take all the money and art on the ship and go to Vegas where they hook up with a high price call girl named Blue... because her skin is dyed blue. Jody and the original vampire agree to leave the city, but Tommy can't stand that idea so he has them bronzed instead. When he drills holes in the bronze so Jody can listen to him talking to her, she turns to mist and streams out of her bronze shell. She then turns him into a vampire. Hilarity ensues as they find a minion in the form of Abby Normal, goth girl and whiner extraordinaire. (She's also the best friend of Lily, one of the main characters from the book A Dirty Job) and her gay best friend. Part of the trouble of now having two vampires to feed is solved by first feeding off of a homeless man named William. William is famous for his sign, which reads I Am Homeless and Have A Huge Cat. The cat, Chet, is where things get interesting.

Because by the end of the novel, when things seem to be going right finally, they begin feeding off Chet. They shave him to have better access and then return him to William. And that's when Chet, the Vampire Cat descends on William and things just go to a whole new level of ridiculous.

And that's also where the third novel starts.

I am not a huge fan of Abby Normal and she is the narrator for You Suck and Bite Me. And in this story, they have to stop the enormous army of vampire cats, birds and vermin that Chet has unleashed on the city. Not to mention all the disappearing homeless people...

I'm not going to wrap up the whole plot and though it might seem like I gave everything away for the previous two, believe me, I didn't. I love Christopher Moore's ability to incorporate characters from other books, like Abby and Lily being best friends and Rivera/Cavuto's past experiences on the force. I also especially appreciate the part where Jody goes into Asher's Second Hand and speaks to Charlie Asher, the main character of A Dirty Job.

But this isn't one of my favorite Moore books. I enjoyed it, don't get me wrong. I liked the idea of the animal vampires being more instinctual and better at  discovering their vampire powers. I liked the mist of mice. I liked the process of finding a vampiric cure. I even kinda liked Chet morphing into more than just a cat... even more than just an enormous vampire cat. I even liked the idea of this coven of vampires from the old world to clean up the mess made by the original vampire, Ben. They roared into town guns (fangs?) a-blazin' to fix the issue only to find... no need. There are indeed a lot of cute parts to this novel, but overall, it just isn't one of the best, in my opinion.

So although I recommend reading it, I don't recommend starting with it. Pick up the first and second and read it to round out the series. Besides, who starts a series at the end? Crazy people. That's who.